Winter Update

I used to be so good at blogging, and now I feel like it's a rare occasion that I get a chance to write 2 words! Christmas was fun! On Christmas eve, chase and I went with my family to the Vervloet's for dinner and then went to Chase's Mexican's party. (Can I say that?) It was cool! Except for the meat that they served was full of fat! Then later that night, we went over to Anisha's to help set up the trampoline that they got for Christmas. (Well, I didn't help. The guys did, and the girls stayed inside chatting. =]) But it looked freezing! Christmas morning, Chase and I opened our presents from each other and then went over to my parents house to open presents with them. It's fun because Kenlie is still so young so she makes it exciting! At 11 we went over to Chase's mom's house to eat breakfast and open presents with them. They are all older so it is fun to get to have an older kid party. =] We got lots of fun things! Cameras to document our soon to be exciting life together, dishes for our new house, clothes, all sorts of fun things! All in all it was a super fun day, and I am so happy I got to spend it with Chaser!

The day after Christmas my family and Chase's family all went bowling at Bountiful Bowl. Its fun that our families can do things together! It was Haden's birthday, so we went to eat at Applebee's after, and it wasn't very good. I can't believe my baby brother is 17! AH!!!!

Last week I went to an appointment with my OB, and they gave me my first Ultrasound. It was so crazy! I got to hear baby's heartbeat, and see her (haha) on the screen. Right now she just looks like a jelly bean, since I am only 7 weeks, but her heartbeat sounded loud and strong. I have my next appointment on January 20th, and will be able to see more then! I think the appointment after that we will be able to see that she is a girl. =] Chase insists it's a boy, but he doesn't know. If it is a girl I think we will name her Xalee Mckell, but no ideas if it happens to be a boy.

Life is crazy right now, finishing up wedding plans and making sure we haven't left anything out. The big day is less than 2 months away and coming so fast! so mark your calenders and watch for an invite in the mail!

The Day

Is February 21st. Mark your calenders!!!

Will you marry me?

While I was at work on Saturday, I got a call from Chase at about 5:30 p.m. He said, "Hey, we are going out tonight, and you have to dress up."

"Dress up?"

"Yeah, no jeans." He confirmed.

I knew something was up. I knew he had something tricky up his sleeve, and that if he wanted me to dress up, then most likely he was going to drop the bomb tonight. Knowing that tonight was the night, sort of took the element of surprise out of the whole situation. So, Cyndi came into work to help me close, and way playing it very coy. "What are you and Chase doing tonight?" She pretended to be uninformed.

"I don't know, Chase called and said we were going out, and asked me to dress up." I answered suspiciously.

"Oh, dang it. I was going to see if you guys wanted to come out with me and Brian." She lied. "But, you two will have fun, I wonder where he is taking you."

"I don't know, but I will let you know for sure." I played along. I knew Cyndi knew exactly what was happening. Chase doesn't blow his nose without talking to his mom about it. And while I love this about him, they both need to realize that they can't pretend to be keeping things from each other. Especially at a time like this. I see right through them.

So... I got all dressed up, did my hair, and went to meet Chase at about 8. We drove out to Salt Lake and he asked me if I have ever eaten at The Roof. I told him that I hadn't and he told me we had reservations at 9:30. Chase really wanted to go on a carriage ride, but when we walked over to where the carriages pick up, there was a line of at least 30 people. Neither of us wanted to wait, so I said, "Let's go walk around." CHASE WAS ACTING SOOO WEIRD! We walked around for a bit, and Chase was just acting so nervous. So we went and sat down by the waterfall in front on the Temple, and I could tell Chase was about to jump out of his skin.

Sitting right next to me, he turned and very normally said, "Meg, will you marry me?" Just sitting there next to me, like it was no big deal, and not a question that he had to think about at all. So I said,

"Yes, of course I will." And he slid a ring on my finger that is identical to one I have been wearing for years, except for 3 sizes too big. Automatically Chase started freaking out.

"OH MY GOSH! IT'S TOO BIG!!!! YOU TOLD ME SIZE 6!"

"No, Chase I told you size 5."

"I can't believe it's too big for you! I feel so dumb, I can't believe this is happening! Oh my heck Meg I am so sorry, I feel so stupid."

So I tried to comfort him, "Chase, calm down we can get it sized it will work out. Calm down. Let's just go eat and it will be fun." He continued to huff and puff.

Inside I was extremely disappointed in Chase. He didn't even get on his knee. I wasn't surprised at all, and it wasn't what I had hoped it would be since I was a little girl. But, at the same time I didn't really care. It was my Chaser, and those five little minutes he ruined with his nerves would be completely irrelevant compared to the many years of fun we had ahead of us.

We went up to The Roof, and sat at our table that was right above the Temple. We ate our dinner and then continued with dessert. After we had filled our bellys, the waiter came up and asked us if we were ready for our check. Chase said yes, and we both sat waiting for the bill. Then, to my suprise, the waiter brought out a silver platter covered in rose petals, and a ring box. There in front of everyone in the whole place (keep in mind a family party of 40 people had just come in and sat right next to us.) Chase got on his knee and asked me to marry him the right way. It gives me chills even thinking about it. Of course I said yes again, and Chase put a much better fitting and most on character beautiful ring I have ever seen. It completely fits my personality and I love it. The hostess was standing near by to take pictures and i'm sure everyone in the whole place was staring. I wouldn't have known either way because I was way too tuned out.

Chase is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and by far the best guy I have ever dated. He puts up with so much from me, and I don't know how he does it. I love him so much and can't wait to start our lives together! I love you Chase!

Fine

You can be invited. =]

Attention:

TO ALL MY BIATCH AUNTS: YOU ARE NOT INVITED TO MY WEDDING. BECAUSE YOU ARE LITTLE SH** TALKERS AND YOU CAN ALL SIT AT HOME AND THINK ABOUT WHAT BAD PEOPLE YOU ARE THAT DAY. YEAH... LESS MONEY I HAVE TO SPEND ON INVITES YOU MEAN INGRATES. SEE IF I AM KIDDING. FREAKING BRATS.

Twilight

So I made Chaser take me to see Twilight a few days ago. I was really excited because I have read all of the books and absolutely fell in love with all of the characters and the story. My anticipation for the movie couldn't have been greater and neither could my disappointment. I HATED IT!!! It was too cheesy and too pretend for me. I know, I know, you say it's about vampires and wherewolves it's supposed to be pretend, but I think the funnest part about the whole story for me is mixing fantasy with reality. The idea of walking around with disguised characters that aren't really what they seem. But no.... Edward was Edward indeed, but not Edward Cullen, to me he was more Edward Scissor Hands, still pale face, terrifiying facial expressions, and out of control hair. Long story short, I was not impressed. The funny part is that CHASE LOVED IT! hahah oh the irony. HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!

Selective Hearing

Ever since I was little my Dad has been telling me I have a bad habit of not listening. I don't think I really understood the severity of that problem or even recognized it as a problem until the last few weeks of my life. I have noticed that I can have a full conversation, be responsive and coherant and walk away not having a clue what they said. I can stare right at a person pretending to listen to what they are staying, and nothing will register in my brain. Its not that I don't want to hear or that I am ignoring them, sometimes my brain is just in LALA land. Ha. At first I thought it was funny, but it's actually a problem! So... If I have a conversation with you and ask you the same question 5 minutes later... don't be offended... I just don't pay attention. ha. Don't worry I will work on it. =]

Home Sweet Home

Well, the trip to Silver City, New Mexico finally came through. We left on Friday morning, woke up at about 4 to catch our flight at 7. Ick. I hate mornings, that doesn't even qualify as morning, to me that is still night time. We had a layover in Vegas then finally made it to El Paso, Texas to pick up the Rental truck and make the drive to Silver City. Only a slight problem on the way there... the Penske truck got high centered while we were trying to figure out where we were. Apparently flipping a U turn on a 2 lane road in the middle of Deming, New Mexico doesn't get you anything but a hundred dollar bill from the tow truck company. =] Oops. (Chase was alot more calm during that fiasco than I would have guessed he would be, so kudos to him.)Overall I was not impressed at all with New Mexico. It is ugly, mostly flat, and all the way boring. The building that had the offices that were being torn down was completely filled with dead beetles and cockroaches. It was disgusting, everywhere you stepped it was inevitable that you would take out at least a few per step. It was a huge building and there were office stations in every square inch possible. I felt bad for the guys who had to take all of the office stations down, ha. Poor souls. Silver City should change it's name to Hole in the Middle of No where. There are no decent places to eat and nothing to do.Our trip was short by 2 days, which I wasn't sad about. The drive home was terribly boring... the same drab dirt and sage brush over and over again. Just before Luna, Arizona we went through these mountains and stopped at a look out point that was really cool. Other than that, it was LAME!

More than anything I was so happy to see grass when we got home. I didn't see one blade from the time our plane took off, to the time we got back to Utah. It's crazy how finished it makes everything look. Now more than ever I am such a Utah girl and could never permanently live anywhere but here! Over all it was a fun trip, but so glad to be back!

Update

Well well well, what do I have to tell you about what is currently going on in my life? It is pretty much awesome. I am more happy now than I have been in a very long time! Still!

Sunday, Chase and I went and listened to his sister Anisha and her husband Steven speak in their ward. They did such a good job. Anisha gave her talk on gratitude. She addressed it to the kids which I thought was such a good idea. She is so darling and has the cutest kids in the world. I love going over there with Chase to play with them, even though they always get so riled up. =] Chase is so cute with kids. That is one of the characteristics that I love the most about him. I love watching him with his Nephews and Niece. Steven also did such a great job on his talk. He talked a little bit about temple marriage, and what a great blessing it is in him and Anisha's life. I can't wait for the day that I can go through the temple with my husband. That afternoon we went back over to Steven and Anisha's house for Aiden's 6th birthday party. He is such a sharp kid. During Sacrement meeting he and I passed notes back and forth to each other and I can't believe how good he is at sounding words out. He is so funny. Chase has such a cute family and I love how close knit they are. It reminds me of my family. Not just relatives, but friends too. His mom has become such a huge influence on me these last few weeks. What a cool lady she is. So strong and so down to earth. Chase is lucky to have her. And I am lucky to know her!

Which brings me to my family. Thanksgiving is coming up and lately I have been thinking about just how grateful I am to have such a neat family. I can talk with them so easily and my siblings are my best friends. I am also lucky to have such a close extended family. I have the best aunts and uncles and cousins I could ever ask for and am so thankful for how close we all are. Don't even get me started on the Grandparent topic because there is not enough memory on this silly blog to express how much my grammy and grumpy mean to me, so I won't even try. Words do no justice for the way I feel about my family.

My dad is such a good provider for our family and loves my Mother so much. He is so sweet and patient with her. He is so intelligent and useful. It is so nice to be able to get an oil change in your own driveway. I am so lucky to have him as a dad.

My mom is my best friend. We fight, we laugh, we cry, we yell, we joke. I am so much like her sometimes it scares me. (Not that it's a bad thing, sometimes I just look at her and laugh at what a nerd she is, and then realize that I am the same way. So thanks mom for making me such a huge FON. hahahah) My mom is the biggest motivator in my life. I know I pretend to ignore what she tries to tell me about the lessons I learn in life, but the truth is, I contemplate everything she tells me on a daily basis, and I remember the things she tells me always. She is such a huge blessing to me and I love her so much. There is not a stronger woman in this world, and defintely no one who could fill the position of my Mother better than she does.

My little brother is such a dork. Ha! He is so smart though. It is weird how the older he gets, the more we have in common. I find him listening to the same music as me, and watching the same movies I like. He is such a good kid, and one day some cute girl is going to be lucky to snatch him up. My sisters are my rocks. Both for different reasons.

Rylie is less like me than Kenlie, but I think that is a good thing. Our personalities balance each other out, and even though we fight more than any of my other siblings, I know that when we get older we will be best friends.

Kenlie is my personality twin. The way she talks about school and friends reminds me so much of how I remember my outlook on life being at her age. She is probably the funniest little girl I have ever met and also one of the most positive. She is so easy to be around and can make me smile even when I am trying not to.

I love my family so much and I am so lucky to be blessed with them in my life!

Well enough blabbing. Here are some pictures, again, just for you Alece. I decided I needed to et one up of the love of my life.... the other one... Sophie. Ha! The other day she sat on my lap while I was getting ready and just slept. It was so precious! It took me like and hour to get ready because I just didn't want to move her! Enjoy!

How Cute

Is my boyfriend? I think he is SUPER cute... I am so blessed to have Chase in my life. He makes me so happy and treats me like a Princess. Actually, just today he told me that I am his Princess. =] And I am.

Things I love most about Chase...

When he kisses me on my forehead

When he gives me butterfly kisses on my cheek

When he surprises me at work

When he calls me Mrs. Moser

When he wraps his arms around me and squeezes hard as he can

When he lets me pick what movie to watch

When he smiles at me

When he holds my hand wherever we go

When he lets me pick where we eat

When he laughs at the stupid things I do

When he puts his foot down when I act like a brat

When he lets me listen to country in his truck

When he laughs at me and lets me throw my fits

When tells me I am cute haha

When he takes me to family events

When he calls Sophie our child

When he is patient with me

When he gets mad and then I laugh at him and he calms down

When he laughs at me when I tell him he has to go see Twilight with me

When I am with him

When I miss him

When I hug him

When I kiss him

Everything about him.

I have the best boyfriend in the world. Sucks for everyone else!

Tagged!

1.Where is your cell phone?

It is in the drawer next to me. I am at work, gotta keep that sucker hiden. =]

2. Where is your significant other?

I am guessing that Chase would qualify as my significant other. Right now, since it is 9 in the morning he is laying in his bed trying to decide if he is ready to wake up.

3. Your hair color?

Platinum blonde right now. I am thinking of making a change though...

4. Your mother?

Is a crazy funny lady who sometimes drives me crazy but always makes me happy!

5. Your father?

Is smart and strong. A fantastic provider for our family.

6. Your favorite thing(s)?

Sophie, movies, Coffee Heath Bar crunch ice cream, summertime

7. Your dream last night?

I don't remember it....

8. Your dream/goal?

To be successful

9. The room you're in?

The front lobby of work. It is FREEZING!!!

10.Your hobby?

Guitar hero =]

11. Your fear?

Being alone.

12. Where do you want to be in 6 years?

Married and a bebe

13. Where were you last night?

Ryan Richins birthday party.

14. What you're not?

Patient, short, overly nice. hahah

15. One of your wish-list items?

A beach cruiser bike

16. Where you grew up?

Spanish Fork & Clinton, UT

17. The last thing you ate?

Carls Junior that my Dad brought me to work yesterday at noon. It has almost been 24 hours since then.

18. What are you wearing?

A black long sleeve, jeans and my cutie hat.

19. Your TV?

Hasn't been used by me in a while.

20. Your pet?

Is the love of my life. Oh cute witto Sophie

21. Your computer?

Sucks. Thanks Windows Vista

22. Your mood?

Tired, bored, starving.

23. Missing someone?

Greg, Manda, Ross, My grammy and grampy, and I haven't seen Sophie in about 12 hours so I miss her too.

25. Something you're not wearing?

A necklace.

26. Favorite store?

Bebe, Bastille, and you can never forget Target.

27. Your Summer?

FANTASTIC! Wish it was still here.

28. Love someone?

My family and friends. And Sophie.

29. Your favorite color?

Black. Don't tell me it's not a color.

30. When is the last time you laughed?

This morning at the crack of dawn talking to Chase's mom. haha

31. Last time you cried?

I have no idea. Ha how funny!

As I mentioned above, I am about 2 seconds away from coloring my hair... This is the coloring I am contemplating.

I really think I am going to go for it... so tell me what you think! CIAO!

BLACKOUT!

GO UTES! Last night me and Chaser went to the Utah vs. TCU game. It has been getting pretty cold lately so I knew we were going to freeze our tooshies off. On our way there Chase stopped and bought us some gloves to keep our fingers warm. We were all bundled up, but I don't think we could have anticipated just how cold it was going to be. We sat on the 15th row in the student section (which are bleachers) and we didn't sit down the whole time! I had no idea it was going to be as cold as it was! Utah was down the whole game and by the fourth quarter and no action since the first, I was starting to lose faith in the boys. But sure enough, the Utes held up their last minute win reputation, and all thanks to the terrible TCU kicker (who missed 2 field goals in a row from MAYBE the 30 yard line) Utah pulled ahead with a touchdown right at the last second. I could not believe how crazy the whole crowd went. Sitting in the student section is always more fun because the crowd is a little more into it. We were jumping and screaming and cheering, and the last quarter was definitely alot more warm than the first! It was such a good game, and I am so happy my Chaser took me!

My trip to New Mexico got pushed to Sunday... so I've still got 2 more days in the cold.

CIAO!

Salute to the Picky Homeless

If I were a bum, (a literal bum, with no home, or clothes, or a bed, or food) I would be willing to accept anything that I was offered. Today, Ashlee and I went to lunch at Lorenas. For those of you who don't know what Lorenas is, it is the best mexican food this side of the equator, and also the second love of my life. Sophie obviously being my first. The meals at Lorenas are extremely big, and Ashlee has alot left over. So she put it in a to-go box, and off we went to run errands. We went to Trolley Square, and ash dropped off her resume to a few places, and as we were pulling out of the parking lot, there was a homeless man standing on the corner with a cardboard sign that read: 'Homeless, hungry, cold. Anything helps.' So I said, "Ashlee! Why don't you give your Lorenas to this sad hungry toothless man?"

"Oh yes of course I should!" She replied. So she flipped around and pulled up right next to him. She rolled down her window and said, "Here you go."

"What is it?" He said with distain.

"It's food." She offered selflessly. He opened the box sniffed it, looked at it, looked at her, looked at me in the passenger seat, paused for a second then said... "Uh.... No thanks."

Can you flipping believe that! A homeless man turned down a box of steaming hot delicious mexican food from two young girls! What has this world come to? Ha. Ingrates.

I can't believe the snow. Ugh. SO depressing. But fun too! I can't wait for winter activities. And that you all for your applications for my winter time partner. I have looked them over, and will be filling the position this week or the next. =]

Well, Alece told me that she loves to read my blog, but she likes to see pictures, so now I guess I will fill up some space with random pictures. Some recent, some not so recent. Enjoy!

This is my darling Chase. He is my snuggle bear. =] He is also my bosses son.

This is me and my friend Mallorie and some random who jumped in the picture at my friend Lex's birthday party. Me and the Wife of course. =] How could you turn down food from us?The HILLACIOUS grandkids. Can you find me? =]

Me and Lynds

The love of my life.

My old friends Justin and Spenc.

All Hallows Eve

Oh what a weekend. =] Ash and I had darling Halloween costumes. I will say myself, we looked pretty stinkin cute. I was Alice in wonderland, and she was the Cheshire Cat. Oh precious right? We didn't do much though. We took KJ trick or treating in the rain and wind. He had 3 Halloween costumes bought for him this year. Ashlee bought him a Hulk costume, which he was afraid of, so Dan (Kj's dad) bought him a skeleton costume, which he was also afraid of, so Ash bought him another dinosaur costume, which he would wear. Ha. But he was afraid of most of the costumes he saw on the other trick or treaters. So he spent most of the trick or treating time crying and being carried by either me or Ash. Funny little bug. =]

I am still extraordinarily happy lately. And the funny thing is, it isn't because of anyone but myself. It's weird how smooth my life seems to be going lately. I love it.

Amanda is back in Oregon. =[ so sad. It was so much fun to have her here for 3 weeks. She will be back for Christmas which will be a blast, but I feel like it is so far away.

Work is going super well. It is starting to get really busy. Which is good. Cyndi is going to start building a Salon for me in the back, which means I need to get my hind quarters in gear so I can be ready to start by the time it is done. She is such a good lady, I am very lucky to have her as my boss. =]

Thanksgiving is coming soon! I can't wait. As long as my brat face uncles don't hand cuff me this year I think I will be ok. I missed thanksgiving last year for a dirt bag guy, so it will be good to be back this year.

Exactly one year ago yesterday, I packed all of my stuff into a suitcase and took off to New York. I can't even being to express how grateful I am to be content enough with where I am in my life that I don't feel like I have to move across the country (California or New York) to get away from the things I don't like. =] ahhhhh yes.

Happy fall 'yall!

The Lodestar of Life

"Love is like the Polar Star. In a changing world, it is a constant. It is something that, when sincere, never moves. It is the very essence of the teachings of Christ. It is the security of the home. It is the safeguard of community life. It is a beacon of hope in a world of distress."

-Gordon B. Hinckley, Standing for Something

LOM

Definition, LOM:
Acronym: Lack of Motivation;

A common occurence in college students, internet junkies, scooter riders, wackee sixers, followers of Dwight Schroute, and MAC geeks.

This week has been good so far. I have enjoyed the weather thoroughly and love driving on the freeway and seeing the mountains splashed with red. This is definitely my favorite time of year. Halloween has always been my favortie holiday, but I am sad for this one. For the first time in 9 years, I have nothing to do Halloween night. I guess I could dress up scary and scare the trick or treaters here at home, but not many kids come to our house anymore. What a pathetic halloween this will be. =[

On a happier note... Thanksgiving is in less than a month and I just love that holiday as well. I am not looking forward to winter though, I am definitely a summer girl. I guess there are fun things about winter.... Christmas lights, cute jackets, christmas music, fires, mistle toe =], sliegh rides, sledding, snow men, snow angels, and of coure Christmas and New Years! Although most of those activities are only fun with a member of the opposite sex... so I am currently accepting applications to be my winter time partner. Resumes can be sent to:

meggydear@gmail.com

Is Sophie a dog or a cat? I thought when I got her, that the lady told me she was a puppy... but as I sit here listening to her Meow, I am beginning to think that she is a feline instead of a canine. I guess maybe I could make a website and make lots of money advertising my cat-dog...

Besides my empty Halloween this should be a good week. I am loving fall, and loving the colors, and can't wait for a good turkey dinner. =] CIAO!!!

The Consequence of Sound

My rhyme ain't good just yet,

My brain and tongue just met,

And they ain't friends,

so far,

My words don't travel far,

They tangle in my hair,

And tend to go nowhere,

They grow right back inside,

Right past my brain and eyes

Into my stomach juice

Where they don't serve much use,

No healthy calories,

Nutrition values.

And I absorb back in

The words right through my skin

They sit there festering inside my bowels

The consonants and vowels

The consequence of sounds.

Got a soundtrack in my mind,

All the time.

Kids-Screamin' from too much beat up

And they don't even rhyme,

They just stand there, on a street corner,

Skin tucked in

And meat side out and shot,

And I'd like to turn them down

But there ain't no knob.

Run into picket fences

Not into picket lines.

All this hippie stuff is for the 60's

Just a cliche for our time.

But a one of these days your heart

Will just stop ticking,

And they sorta just don't find you till your cubicle is reeking.

Did you know that the gravedigger's still

Gettin' stuck in the machine

Even tough it's a whole other daydream.

It's another town it's another world,

Where the kids are asleep,

where the loans are paid

And the lawns are mowed.

Whad'ya think?

All the gravediggers were gone?

Just cause one song is done

There's always another one,

Waiting right around the bend,

Till this one ends,

Then it begins

Squeaky clean, then it starts all over again.

The weather report keeps on

Tossing and turning,

Predicting and warning,

And warning and warning of,

Possible leakage from news publications and,

Possible leakage from news TV stations.

That very same morning right next to my coffee

I noticed some bleeding and heard hollow coughing and

National Geographic was being too graphic,

When all I had wanted to know was the traffic

"The worlds got a nosebleed"

it said

"And we're flooding but we keep on cutting

The trees and the forests!"

And we keep on paying those freaks on the TV,

Who claim they will save us but want to enslave us.

And sweating like demons they scream through our speakers

But we leave the sound on 'cause silence is harder.

And no one's the killer and no one's the martyr

The world that has made us can no longer contain us

And profits are empty then rotting away 'cause

The consonants and vowels

The consequence of sounds.

In-er-sun

I don't know why I have been blogging so much. I guess I just feel like writing all the time, I don't know.

Church was good today. It was the primary program today, and Kenlie did such a good job. She is so cute, and I love her so much. My mom gave the lesson today in YW, and she also did such a good job. I think her lesson was so important especially to the young women today. She talked about the story of the ugly duckling, and pointed out that he was not the outcast because he was necessarily ugly, but because he was different. Because his feathers were gray instead of yellow, and his neck was a bit longer than the other ducklings. After time had passed he began to grow and develope into a beautiful swan, and was no longer thought of as the "ugly duckling."

Society puts so much pressure on girls these days to be more thin and pretty. Every where you go, there is someone or something telling or showing you how you need to look dress and act. It leaves no room for difference, or accepting of something that is a change from what they think perfect is. It is sad how vain our world has become.

My mom talked about loving yourself. And having self confidence in your own skills, abilities, talents, and personal appearance. She talked about how you can't serve and love other people until you know how to love yourself. I think that concept can also be turned around. People can't fully love, respect and appreciate you, unless you can love and appreciate yourself. Even though my moms class was extremely uncooperative, and unresponsive, I think she did a very good job teaching the lesson. It was an important one for girls of that age to hear. If I could give my little sisters one piece of advice as they grow up, it would be to love themselves for who they know they are and who they want to be, and to never lower or change their standards to please anyone else.

I have the 2 most amazing little sisters on this earth. Rylie is so sensitive to other people's feelings and so fun to be around. She has such a bright personality and she can make you laugh at anytime. I think Rylie has more self confidence than most 14 year old girls I have ever met. She is who she is, and doesn't care much about what other people think about her. She is so willing to help around the house with chores and extra things, and is such a close friend to me, that I feel like I can confide anything in her.

Kenlie is my ray of sunshine. She is one of the biggest examples to me in my life. She is always so positive. I can't express to you what a positive influence she is to me in my life. She cares so much about everyone around her and would do anything to help anyone out. She has so much love inside her and not enough time to give it all out. She is the most unselfish little girl I have ever met with such a strong testimony. I have never met a little girl who is more willing to give and help with such a positive attitude. I think most people in my life could take a lesson from Kenlie on how to love your friends and family. She is such a good example to everyone around her and I love her so much.

I hope that my two little sisters can always remember who they are. It is so hard to grow up and it gets harder everyday.

Amanda leaves tomorrow to go back to Oregon. I am so sad! She is my best friend. She is like my crutch. I feel like me and amanda go through the same things in life at the same time. I am so sad that she is leaving, I feel like my rock is being taken away from me. She is also such a positive influence on me. But she will be back. =]

Last night, Justin came over and I just have to share this picture. Justin thinks a mustache is the in style facial hair trend right now.... (no one dares tell him that it's not.) He just hasn't got it long enough yet to where is significantly pops out and catches your eye. So.... we painted over it with mascara. You would have though it was Christmas morning for the kid. Talk about love for yourself, I don't think he has been that happy with his appearance ever. Ha! Funny boy. So here is the picture of me and Justin, his pervert mustache, and our love child Sophie. (yes, justin loves Soph almost as much as I do.)

.....

Paint me a picture

or sing me a song.

Splash all the colors,

hold all the notes long.

Freshen my memory,

clear all the clouds.

Bring them by one,

or bring them in crowds.

Paint my mental landscape,

sing my intellectual song,

filter them out

from the right and the wrong.

Bring back the days

when the sunset reached far,

and let's watch the sun

fade into the stars.

Reach out your hand,

grabonto it tight,

hold it in your hands

and share all its light.

Live life in the present,

leave worries in the past.

The last stress you took on

was surely your last.

Hold onto the moments

you know will mean most,

and gather the new ones

as through this rough world we coast.

Remember the people

who mean most to you.

Memorize their ways,

for they will surely grow few.

Trace all the steps

to your favorite place to be,

and smile when you get there,

because it matters to me.

Never take for granted

the time you spend with friends,

for those moments will be memories

as we come to an end.

Teach something you've learned

to a stranger or friend,

education is contagious

a silent message we send.

Never underestimate the enemies you keep,

no enemies at all and a balanced life you'll reap.

Listen to the music

and hear all the notes,

hear the sounds and lyrics all seem to float.

Never give up when you seem too far in,

keep pulling for the surface and victory you shall win.

Look every stranger you pass in the face,

for you never know which stranger will be your saving grace.

For me.

I am for me. I wake up for me. I live for me. I sleep for me. I dream for me. I eat for me. I talk for me. I think for me. I play for me. I have fun for me. I cry for me. I laugh for me. I interact for me. I react for me. I run for me. I lay for me. I dance for me. I sing for me. I listen for me. I scream for me. I get angry for me. I am happy for me.

When i wake up in the morning, I don't think 'who I am going to live each day for?' I already know. I can do anything by myself. Why was I ever so silly to think that I needed someone else's motivation. There are only two relationships in my life that I care about right now. (not including sophie's.) And my relationship with myself can not be interupted by anyone but my spiritual relationship.

I can be happy everyday without depending on anyone to do it for me.

So take that.

Tina Wilkinson

Sorry Tina for not mentioning you in my grateful list. Ha. You know I love you even when you are mean to me and tell me I am a lost cause. Ha. I still love you. I am happy. Still. Loving life.
So here are some words courtesy of Michael Buble.

Birds flying high

You know how I feel

Sun in the sky

You know how I feel

Reeds driftin' on by

You know how I feel

It's a new dawn

It's a new day

It's a new life

For me

And I'm feeling good

Fish in the sea

You know how I feel

River running free

You know how I feel

Blossom in the tree

You know how I feel

It's a new dawn

It's a new day

It's a new life

For me

And I'm feeling good

Dragonfly out in the sun you know what I mean, don't you know

Butterflies all havin' fun you know what I mean

Sleep in peace when the day is done, that's what I mean

And this old world is a new world

And a bold world

For me

Fooor me

Stars when you shine

You know how I feel

Scent of the pine

You know how I feel

Yeah freedom is mine

And I know how I feel

It's a new dawn

It's a new dayIt's a new life

It's a new dawn

It's a new dayIt's a new life

It's a new dawn

It's a new day

It's a new life

It's a new life

For me

And I'm feeling good.

AND I'M FEELING GOOD.

Ode to Happiness

Some say they think it's right for people to be happy. That in fact they should be happy. Well, some do find a reason for happiness from the set of possibilities provided by current reality. Others see a potential happinessfrom the set of possibilities that are not yet provided by reality. The first group is lucky, I guess.Such folk say to the second group, "You are unrealistic." And, "You should be happy." The second group helplessly shrugs.They detest the first group. The second group changes the world. Happiness is so much more meaningful when you know what the world is like without it. How can you feel warm when you have never been cold? How can you feel full when you have never felt hunger? So how can you know what it looks like when the sun rises if you have been living in darkness your whole life?



For a long time i think i meandered through mediocracy. I was ok with the glass not being full or empty. In the middle was just ok for me. And just ok was sufficient. I don't know why it changed. I don't know why I feel different. I don't know why I can look at the sun and even though I know it will rise everymorning, i can appreciate it even still. I am grateful to the people in my life who want to make me a better person. I am grateful for the people who want to see me with my glass half full.

I found this website while I was searching for quotes. I thought it was pretty interesting.

http://help.com/post/199270-i-noticed-everyone-belonging-to-th

I thought that was pretty funny. =]

Anyways. For the first time in a long time. I am happy. =] I don't know why, but I don't really care. =]


"The way will be lighter, the worries will be fewer, the confrontations will be less difficult if we cultivate a spirit of happiness."
Gordon B. Hinckley - Oct. Conf 2002

How Grateful I am.

My earlier post about how no one knows me, I think came across wrong. Maybe it was just the downer mood I was in, or something else... I don't know. But I have the most awesome people in my life. I think that sometimes i take for granted how many things in my life are such huge blessings. So thank you, Lynds, and Linds, and Debbie for helping me to remember. So now, I am going to take a minute and list all of the things that I am most grateful for.

Sophie

My dad

My mom

Haden

Rylie

Kenlie

My extended family

My friends

(namely Manda, Kyle, Ash.)

My old friends

(Their mothers =])

A house to live in

Food to eat

A car to drive

My grandparents

Patience and Understanding

Repentance

The lessons I have learned

The places I have been

Candy

Diet Coke

Long length jeans

Flat shoes

Earrings

Fall time

The sun

People who are different than me

Honesty

Integrity

Tough love

Fruit and Veggies

Jason's Deli

The people who make me happy

Movies

Music

(Namely the shins for keeping me from going insane.)

Words

I am a Sailor.

The gutter may profess its love,
Then follow it with hesitation,
But there are just so many of
You out there for rent
A stronger girl would shake this off in flight,
And never give it more than a frowning hour,
But i have let my heart decide,Loss has conquered me,
You've won one too many fights,
Wearing many hats every time,
But you wont win here tonight,
You've made it through the direst of straits alright,
Can you help it if plain love now seems less interesting?
You haven't changed an ounce in my eyes,
And I cannot lecture you,
And does anything I say seem relevant at all?
You've been at the helm since you were just five,
While I cannot claim to be more than a passenger,
But, you've won one too many fights,
Wearing all of your clothes at the same time,
Let the good times end tonight,
Oh girl, sail her, don't sink her,
This time,
Just a moment or two from now,
Not a mind will retain even a trace,
Of the thoughts that I struggled to tell
And how our stack of cards just fell,
So settle this once and for all,
The light no longer shows the cracks around my door,
And I have no lantern to light your way home tonight,
You are not some saint who's above,
Giving someone a stroll through the flowers,
You've got so much more to dream of,
Oh girl, sail her, don't sink her,
This time.

ARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGAHHHHHHHHUGGGGGGGGGHMMMMMMMMMPHHHHHHH!

yep. i said it. no one really even reads my blog. so why write? i dont know. i guess it's a vent. i can say what i want, and maybe it is a little more comforting knowing that no one will read it.



i ended things with chris. so now, after its done you can see his face. brace yourself.

yeah there he is. in all of his glory. it didn't work.

this morning after i woke up, i was just sitting there in my bed thinking.... there is not one single person in this whole entire world that knows me. right here on this day of October whatever day it is, not one single person knows megan. my family has no idea what is going on in my life. My friends have no idea what is going on in my life, no one knows me. after i thought about that i cried. for a good 20 minutes. how pathetic is my life that no one consistently cares about what happens everyday of my life. i will go ahead and say that is probably one of the most terribly sad things i have ever had to tell myself. and even now, i can write all of this, but really.....? the only person who might read this, is the mother of someone who used to know me. ha. wow.
anywho. work is good. oh and i have hung out with justin lake twice in the last 3 days. probably the best thing to happen since the last time we hung out 3 1/2 years ago.

i have decided that i hate the internet. i hate how public it makes everyone lives. i hate knowing everything about someone because i can read it on facebook or myspace or on their blog. i hate cell phones too. i wish cell phones and internet were never inventer. eek. what a world.

i guess that is it.

This one's for Deb. Ha, sundevil.

My life, still, is freakin boring. But... like i said, i DO have a boyfriend. His name is Chris, he is an old fart. He was married before and has a 2 year old son named Trae, who i adore. He is sooooo cute. But he treats me really good, i have alot of fun with him. So for now, i am ok. But you all know how i am with guys... so we will see how long it lasts. My friend Bry Bry pulled a shady move, and is now on his way to Louisianna to go to prison. If you have watched the news lately you have probably heard that story about the 3 men arrested for the underage girls, dirty website, and booze RV. Yeah talk about a bad weekend in Mardi Gras. They will never live this down. Anywho. I'm sure you all heard all about it, and it was a huge shock to everyone that knew him. We thought he was such a good guy, and no one had any idea any of this was going on. So, that is weird. And sad. I feel bad for him. MANDA IS OUT OF ALASKA!!!!! WOOHOO!!! i think she may be in utah sometime soon which will be such a happy happy day for me. hmmmm. what else?

I just love fall. It is so fun. And i love halloween it is so fun too. I just am sad that winter comes next. =[ i think that is all. Oh, and i freaking HATE Miley Cyrus. Hannah Montana can rot in hell. Such a dirty skank face.

Fall

Got a boyfriend. Name's Chris. That's all.

BORING

I haven't written much in a while. That's because I don't have much to write. My life is pretty booooooooring lately. So I guess I will just give you a quick update on what is going on. I am getting my shiii together to get school started up again. Hopefully here within the next few weeks. But, deep down in my heart I will always be a bum. =] My bestie Ash's birthday is this Wednesday so we are having a little shin dig for her this weekend at her cabin. We were going to try and make it a surprise, but that didn't work out because she has to get the keys from her padre. So... boo. Umm.... I've been sick the last week, but I am starting to get over it. Jennie had her baby. Welcome to the world little Gracie May!

She is sooo tiny! I think Jennie told me just a little over 3 lbs. But doing well! They expect her to be in the NICU for about a month.

Ummm.... other than that.... nothing. I guess here is a picture from our girls night.... enjoy!

Swimming!

I just had to put this picture up because Kay is soo flippin cute and i just love her! How can you not! Me and Lynds took her swimming and I can not believe how much she loves it! She is such a doll!

Lake Powell

Ok, Ok so it's been a while since i updated this stupid thing... hahah I don't know why I thought having a blog was a good idea, it's just one more thing I have to keep up on and don't. Oh well. So i just got home from Lake Powell, and IT WAS A BLAST!!! I didn't even want to come home! But... all good things must come to an end! We hiked through some really amazing slot canyons in Smith Fork Canyon. It was unearthly hot, and we even went at like 7 in the morning. I pity the fool who tried during the day! Anywho... here are some fun pictures from Powell... ENJOY!